


Sweats

by crapso



Series: Tumblr Prompts [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: First Dates, M/M, Nervousness, Tsukishima's pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-13
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-03-17 17:38:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3538253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crapso/pseuds/crapso
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><b>justtrustmeandjump:</b> since you're taking prompts for ships besides kagehina, can you please do a fluffy first date with tsukishima and yamaguchi?? preferably with a super nervous tsukki who tries playing it cool and yamaguchi being a smug dork lmao seriously, you'd make my life omgf and also I love your fics so much pls keep writing omgg ヽ(///∇///)ノ</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweats

He was sweating.  _Why_  was he sweating so much? Kei swore, at that dinner table in that three star restaurant—he had never once, in his life, sweat like this before. 

But isn’t that always how it went for first dates? Things always happened at the worst times and words always came out the worst way. Funny.

“You can pay.”

Actually, no. It wasn’t funny. It was anything but funny.

“No, no.” He tried to correct his words, the brunette sitting across the table from him with raised eyebrows, “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m not  _asking_  you to pay. It’s just, you know how couples always fight for the cheque at the end of the meal? I just want to avoid that. I mean- unless you want me to pay for it all.” He almost jumped out of his seat, “Not that we’re a couple! Not yet- I mean! Sorry, I didn’t-”

Giggling. Soft tinkling laughter and Kei thought it was from a table over, but it wasn’t. It was right across. 

His date, Tadashi giggled into his hand until pulling back and going, “Don’t sweat it, silly. We’ll split the cheque when it comes.”

Kei nodded shortly.

* * *

“Yeah, I didn’t have a lot of nicknames in high school.” Kei re-adjusted himself in a chair. Oh, god, was that a bead of sweat rolling down his back? Gross.

“I did.” Tadashi said. How they got to this conversation topic Kei had no idea. He took a long sip of water to get rid of some of the sweat as the brunette continued, “It’s actually kinda funny… they used to call me ‘banana boy’-”

Kei choked on his waiter, spitting up right into the glass.

“A-are you okay?”

_“Mhm!”_

Tadashi reached out, unsure of what to do, and waited for Kei to stop coughing—pairs of eyes watching them in the restaurant. After a few minutes and Kei’s coughing grew to a minimum, he mumbled.

“…They called me that, because every day at school I used to bring a banana to lunch. That’s… all.”

“Yeah. Yeah. I knew that.”

“Good.”

Tadashi was busying himself with the menu and Kei kept touching his armpits, casually, trying to see if they were getting even sweatier without being too obvious-

“I’m going to go to the bathroom.”

Kei jumped, “I’m not touching my arm p-!”

Tadashi was standing up, hand on the table, staring at him with wide eyes. “Sorry, what?”

“Nothing, nothing.”

“Okay. I’ll be back soon.”

“Yeah, have fun.” Have fun?  _Have fun?_

Tadashi just laughed again, “You’re not my mom.” His long freckled smile lingered a little bit longer than necessary and his side brushed Kei’s arm as they passed their table for the bathroom. Kei was in a little haze of ecstasy from that, until he snapped out of it, and quickly snapped a short, redheaded waiter over.

“Oi- psst, oi!”

He came over, looking a little peeved, “What is it, sir? Ready to order? We have some really nice specials tonight-”

“Don’t give me any of that crap, I know what the specials are tonight.” Kei hissed and leaned over, “Listen. I’m on a date tonight.”

“I know, I’ve been watching.” The waiter said, deadpanned, “It’s really sad to watch.”

“Okay, alright.” Kei glared viciously, “I need less yelpin’ and more helpin’.”

“What?”

“Listen.” He sat back in his seat and placed his hands on the table, “This is how the night could go. It could either be the worst date of my life, or the best date of my life.”

“Or?” The waiter said judgementally, “It could just be a nice, normal date-?”

“I don’t have time for nice, normal fucking dates.” Kei whispered fiercely, “Did you see that guy? He has  _freckles_.  _Everywhere_.”

The waiter smiled, “They look like the night-sky.”

Kei pointed at him, “They  _do_  look like the night-sky.”

“So… what’s the problem?”

“The prob-” Kei covered his face for a second and then resurfaced, “The  _problem is_  that I won’t be able to match up with his coolness, blow it, and he’ll either make it all okay or be weirded out and never talk to me again. And we will never adopt those two kids named Taisho and Momoru.”

The waiter stared, “… Holy shit, dude.”

“Yeah, I’m a basket case, I get it.”

“Like a serious, serious basket case.”

“Okay.” Kei began fixing his tie, “And that is where I need your help.”

The waiter sighed, putting his pad away, “It has been boring here tonight, alright I’ll help.”

“Great. First thing’s first… deodorant.”

“Deodorant?”

“I need it. Slip it with my meal, somehow.”

“I’d… have to talk to the chefs.”

“Well, figure that out.” Kei demanded, fidgeting his tie in place, “And another thing, we need a code sound.”

“Do we really?”

“Yes! A code sound for when the date is absolutely falling apart and at its lowest low, I need a code sound that will initiate you to come over and give us the cheque.”

“What would be our code sound?”

Both men pondered, until the redheaded one perked up, “Ooh! How about a crow-sound! Like a ‘caw-caw’! It’s perfect, why would there be a crow in a restaurant?”

“Yeah, yeah, sounds good.” Kei waved his hand, “So when I ‘caw’, you come over and give us the cheque.”

He pursed his lips, “Okay… but why would I just randomly come over and give you guys the cheque?”

Kei shrugged, “Say you have last-minute reservations for this spot who’ve changed their mind, Jesus Christ, I don’t know. Say the prime minister is coming-”

“Why would… the prime minister be coming  _here_ , to this three-star restaurant, sir-?”

“I don’t have time to organize the details, that’s your job.” Kei pulled out a small card out of his wallet and slipped it into the waiter’s shirt pocket, “For your troubles.”

The waiter looked down, “You just gave me a ten dollar gift card for a prescription lens store, sir.”

“Take it,” Kei was staring nervously at the bathroom door, “free of charge.”

“I don’t even have glasses.”

“Yeah, well you  _better get a fucking pair.”_  Kei growled, the bathroom door opening and the waiter yelped and walked away. 

“D-deodorant!” Kei squealed after him.

Tadashi sat down across him with an odd smile on his face, “Why were you just yelling at that waiter about deodorant?”

“N-no reason.”

“Hmm.” Tadashi smiled, opening up the menu, “Shall we order? I guess I should have asked first before going to the bathroom, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay! It’s all okay!” Kei felt like crying. He was kind, but even  _he_  made mistakes. And something about hearing him apologize, even once through the night, comforted Kei oddly.

Tadashi laughed again sweetly, and Kei looked up in shock.

“What? What is it?” Oh, god. Did he have food on his face already, when they hadn’t even ordered food yet?

“It’s just…” Tadashi laughed again and fidgeted in his seat, looking up at Kei with big brown eyes, “It’s stupid. But I’m just… kinda nervous.”

Kei went blank for a few seconds, probably blacked out.

“Y- you’re kinda nervous?”

“Yeah, you couldn’t tell?” Tadashi laughed again, the sound melting into a long smile as he stared at his date across the table, and Kei couldn’t help share it and flash a small one back.

And sitting at that table, being nervous, and smiling across at his also nervous date who was smiling back at him—Kei couldn’t help feel that if a meteor came and crash-landed right on this restaurant, that would be perfectly okay. He could die happy.

He broke his gaze from the amazing freckled smile and looked across the room at his waiter—who was running his hand underneath his arm as a charade for using deodorant and mouthing, ‘you still want some?’

Kei shook his head back, feeling silly. He wouldn’t need any.

* * *

“Wait, wait, so why would you put the poor bastard on the roof?!”

Tadashi snorted into his wine, “He was pissing me off! We were both ten- I don’t know!”

“Oh my god. This is like Parent Trap all over again.”

“We  _were_  in a summer camp.” Tadashi laughed, “I was just trying to be cool. And he started the pranking war first.”

“Wow.” Kei leaned back in his chair and smiled over his glass, “You do have a flaw: you’re a bad person.”

“I was ten!” They laughed again. Ever since confessing his hidden nervousness, Tadashi’s relaxed smile and confidence had rubbed off on his date and it had gone smooth since then. No choking, no spills, no accidental insults or awkward conversation. Not even any sweating—as if all of Kei’s bodily functions had magically disappeared. 

“I’m not some flawless person, y’know.” Tadashi said, giving a very flawless smile that contrasted with his statement.

“I don’t know…” Kei murmured, “You seem like the closest thing to it.” Whoa. Was he flirting? That’s new.

Tadashi just blushed, and raised his arm suddenly, forwardly, “Do you think a flawless person would sweat like  _this?”_

Kei just grinned openly, “You have pit stains too!”

“Chya!” Tadashi laughed, “Why do you think I didn’t want to call the short waiter over for a re-fill.”

Kei covered his face with his hand to let out a short laugh—even though he felt like giggling until dawn at this point. This whole date had been so silly, so ridiculous, and yet- the best one of his life.

Tadashi lowered his arm and sighed, “Wanna hear something else I learned at summer camp?”

“Shoot.”

“Animal calls.” He leaned in and grinned, “I’m gonna mess with the old guy over there with bad hearing.”

Kei snorted and leaned in too, “Do it.”

Tadashi suddenly cupped his mouth, forming bird noises,  _“Caw-caw!”_

The old man seated a few chairs over jumped and spun around in his chair, frantically searching for the crow haunting him and the pair laughed evilly behind their menus. And Kei  _would_  have laughed longer… if-

“Oh my gosh, sirs.” The redhead appeared again quickly, “I am so sorry, but you two are going to have to leave.”

“What?” Tadashi asked.

Kei looked up with widened eyes and internally cursed a million times. Shit, shit, shit, what are the fucking goddamn odds.

“Actually-” He said desperately, “We don’t.” He kept his face deadpanned but his eyes were sending frantic, angry messages to the shorter waiter.

He just looked back, confused, “Um… I’m pretty sure you do. Someone made reservations before but cancelled, and then they just called now, last-minute. They want their table back.”

“Oh!” Tadashi said; sounding disappointed but not really. Why didn’t he sound more disappointed? “Who wants their table back? A couple?” He asked.

Don’t say it. Don’t say it.

“The prime minister, actually.”

Kei hid his face in his hands.

“What? Really?” Tadashi just looked boggled, “The prime minister.”

“Yup!” The waiter replied too cheerily. Kei suddenly slapped the table and leaned in.

“Well, can’t the  _prime minister_  wait?”

“Uh, no? I’m pretty sure he can’t? Isn’t this what the prime minister wanted the whole time?”

“Yeah, but maybe the prime minister changed his mind.” He hissed, “So, I think, the prime minister _doesn’t_ want his table back.”

“No.” The waiter growled back, “I’m pretty sure the prime minister  _does_  want his table back.”

“I really don’t think he freaking does.”

“Kei?” Tadashi frowned and touched his hand lightly, “What’s going on?”

“I- uh-”

“Well,” The waiter said firmly, “you’re just gonna have to deal with that in political court.”

“Why you little-”

_“Wha-”_

“You know what.” Tadashi said, putting his hands up. Both men held their breath and waited for him to throw down his towel and say he’s done and leave the restaurant in a huff, but that didn’t happen.

“We can leave.” He said finally, he smiled, “It’s okay, honestly. We can just go.”

“But we’re having such a good time.” Kei whined.

“Yeah… but.” Tadashi shrugged, “Doesn’t mean we can’t have a good time somewhere else.”

Somewhere else. Somewhere else?

“S-somewhere-” He jerked, feeling a sudden air brush on his leg and realizing Tadashi’s foot was slowly drawing it’s way up his shin—and his smile suddenly stopped looking so sweet and innocent and started looking like something else and- god, he was really the luckiest person in the world.

He cleared his throat, saying quietly to the waiter, “Get us our cheque, we’ll split it. And send the prime minister our regards.”

The waiter rolled his eyes and walked away and Tadashi let out a small giggle behind his hand.

“You’re insane.” He said happily, “Like… basket case insane.”

Kei smiled at him from across the table, “…Yeah. I know.”


End file.
